Dear New Working Mom

This letter sure helps the new working momma.   There's nothing like that day you drop baby off for the first time to go to work.   I admit there are many days I wonder if I'm doing the right thing by working.  This gave me a lot of comfort and insight.  Thanks to you "older mom" for writing this.  You know I'm over the moon proud of all you've accomplished since your 19th birthday!  

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Dear New Mother-

You're 23 years old. No one else in your peer group is having babies. That's okay. Age does not necessarily beget wisdom in this department. NO ONE has this figured out. Pretty much every mom I've met over the last decade is just figuring it out as she goes along. Moms of infants, moms of teenagers, we're all just flying by the seat of our pants. 

You will have to work full-time. Get over it. Seriously, don't spend so much time wallowing in self-pity. Your kids will go to day care. So what? That doesn't mean "they are raised by strangers." People will say unkind things about your work status. People will hurt you with their words and their assumptions. But your kids are going to be amazing. Read that sentence again. Your kids are going to be amazing. Their time in day care teaches them so much. Things you would never think teach them. Also, the caregivers they have over the years will become part of your family. They will be in your life long after your children go to school. 

So I know it seems like a big deal right now. I know you think of yourself as less of a mother because you have to work 40+ hours a week at a job. But I'm almost 12 years into this working mom thing and I wish I hadn't let it bother me so much. I wish it hadn't taken me so long to be confident in my mothering. Stop worrying about other people and what they think of your parenting. Listen to advice, surely, but no one else is an expert on your kids. You know them better than anyone else ever will. 

So New Mom, surround yourself with great friends and family. Find a church. Find a moms group. Build a support system. And remember, no one has this figured out!

Love, 

An Older Mom